That is the way the cookie crumbles…

My grandmother always used to say that.  Every time something didn’t go the way I anticipated it, that is what she told me.   In the past few years, my floor had gotten covered in crumbs.

What is the most heartbreaking though is the people.  I have read the “Are you a reason, a season or a lifetime friend” poem.  I get it.  I think it’s a great way to put it.  I am sad, cause I have lost some lifetimes.

I have been a part of some amazing relationships.   I have felt completely connected.  And then nothing.

People I thought would always be in my daily life… aren’t.

There are relationships I have been invested in, relationships I fought for.  I also think I don’t have much fight left in me.  Where do you draw the line at letting go or giving up?

I am so grateful for the lasting relationships in my life.  I don’t want the people  I love to think I don’t appreciate them.  I was just a little lost in contemplation today.  I am playing some of the what if things had gone differently game.  Wondering if I should have fought harder.

 

 

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~ by cutefatgirl on April 11, 2011.

2 Responses to “That is the way the cookie crumbles…”

  1. It’s tough. I lost a long term relationship, a few years ago. It was hard, but I don’t regret it. I also lost a couple of friendships recently. I hadn’t known these women for very long, but I thought we would be lifelong friends. Turns out I *didn’t* know them well.

  2. I am there…right with you with the same sorts of feelings going on. Wishing I could figure it all out myself. Sometimes it is best to just give it to God, because it will literally kill you if you spend your life trying to fight for something that is already gone. Don’t look back unless you are in rememberence of something good…onward and upward and don’t get upset if you have moments of pure sadness…they will pass and become fewer and farther between…and in the end you will be stronger and love harder and the people that are still there are the ones who mattered the most in the first place and the ones that forever belongs to. (right now is my weak time, the cake in the fridge looks overwhelmingly good to me and I am not even hungry)I know if I ate it I would go into a sugar coma and maybe not wake up and so instead I will do what I should do and just cry…and tomorrow hopefully wake up with a fresh outlook and new hope. God can lead us to the places we need to be but only we can actually take the steps to finish the journey. If you ever need me, I am here…I have said it before and I will say it again…and I will always mean it!!

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