so sick of me.

Karma hates me.  My very first call today, the client was from Lawrenceville, Ga?  I can barely concentrate on my call because all I am thinking is Ryan is in Lawrenceville right now.  Talk about throwing me off my game. 

Thursday is like D-Day for me.  Every week, I hate it.  It was always a special day because the boys came home.  I’d get so excited to hear about their week and kiss their little faces.  Getting them baths and Pjs, sharing a story and a video game.  No amount of wine lessons that.   Ryan also had that last half hour of being us.  We would lay on the couch and kiss and sometimes he would just hold me.  I am going to need several gallons of wine, just to drink myself into a stupor.  I know y’all are tired of hearing this, I am tired of me and I love me.

How can a heart be so broken? How did the life God tailor made for me just disappear overnight?  I have been a wreck all day.  Miserable.  Can’t someone put me out of my misery?

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~ by cutefatgirl on October 1, 2010.

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